Wednesday, September 24, 2014

Know Your Limits

Graduate school is a practice of many things. You become well versed in the academia and current scholarship, hone your ability to discuss and write about complex themes and ideas, discover first hand the effects too much (or too little) caffeine can have on the human body, build a strong network of peers and scholars, and, mostly by necessity, learn your limits and the dangers of taking on too much. I've always had a problem with not overloading my plate and saying no, but, as I realized last year, which is quickly being reinforced this semester, the ability to say no, understand your limits, and take a break now and then is a valuable skill to learn, not just to ensure your success in school, but to also ensure your general survival throughout your academic and subsequent career. 

There are dozens of opportunities available out there that can benefit professionally and academically, and many of which can really boost the quality of a CV. Especially at the beginning of the semester, before work picks up and homework is relatively light, it is far too easy to sign up for too much, asserting your own personal capabilities and reasoning that another responsibility really wouldn't be that much work. And this may be true, to an extent. Graduate school should go beyond your general experience in the classroom. Academic and professional enrichment will, in the long run, prove to be a benefit and, for a history major such as myself, diversity in different skill sets is being pressed as a result of the declining job market in academia. The amount of stable, open positions in an academic field for history is extremely low at the moment, so recent graduates are having to look elsewhere for employment, such as at museums or non-profit organizations. Having a diverse set of skills and experience outside of coursework can be valuable to ensure future success and stability and will provide more options in case Plans, A, B, C, and D don't work out, at least not at first. 

However, there is a fine line between going beyond your coursework and taking on some extra responsibilities and overloading your workload, which will inevitably result in declining health, anxiety attacks, a vanishing social life, and the slow and painful crushing of your spirit. I can fully attest to these effects. Every semester during my undergraduate, I would constantly take on too much, nearly kill myself attempting to finish it all, rant about how I would never do that again, then rinse and repeat. As a grad student, I wanted to change my bad habits (which really were affecting my overall health). 

The success of this attempt, however, remains to be determined. As always, I still took on too much, but I was a bit more considerate in thinking about my responsibilities and I spent far more time truly weighing the responsibilities I had and I wanted to have before committing to them. It did take some reinforcement from friends, family, and mentors, many of which told me to just stop when I attempted to take four classes in one semester and adamantly persuaded against taking on more than what I could handle. As a result, I have scaled back my general workload considerably, which was very quickly taken up by my graduate coursework which ended up being more of a mountain than the molehill I originally anticipated. 

I still struggle with saying no to new obligations, however. Last week, I actually had to drop out of a fellowship that I was apart of due to the stress and extra work it required, which really did not benefit me as much as I was hoping and the overall expense of my time and effort was not worth the rewards. I am not saying that quitting was a proper solution; I should have said no from the start if I thought that it was going to be too much. I hate quitting myself and can be very stubborn when it comes to letting something that I've started go uncompleted. However, I do consider it a slight success that I was able to decline a responsibility and acknowledge the detrimental effect it was having on the rest of my work. 

There is no ultimate solution to not taking on too much. You should be open to new opportunities, but mindful of the workload you currently have as well as your own personal limitations. This is something that I am still struggling with and will most likely have to deal with for the rest of my life, which is fine. I'm honestly glad that I am at least more aware of my personal limits and am somewhat alright with saying no and focusing on the work that really matters, as well as trying to enjoy the non-work-related aspects of my life. It isn't easy, but finding this balance or at least being aware of it is vital to learn as a scholar and academic. 

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